I'm working on the spring show at BYU right now as an ASM. My friend Dave asked me to be the ASM for the class and I needed some more credits last semester so I agreed. Currently, my job is to sit stage right, set props, call 5 scene changes, catch an apple...I think that's actually it. So far, I've played 4 full games of Phase 10 with my crew (I've won two!) and many games of speed. We've had a lot of down time.
I am extremely unsatisfied with my experience with this show. I don't feel creatively stimulated or satisfied. I was just telling Dave that I need to find something about the show that I love. There were several things that stood out to me during the reading we first did of the script. I teared up 3 times! But now that the show is up on its feet and I am involved in back stage-ness, I've lost any feelings of love that I may have ever had for this show. I need to find something that I love to make this show a good experience. I really hate how much I dread going to rehearsal, how useless I feel there, and how unhappy I am when I come home. I know that you choose your own attitude or whatever, and I've tried to think positively about this show, but I haven't succeeded. I really need to find one thing, even if it's just one tiny thing, that I love!
The sounds and projections are cool (they're fantastic actually!). But I can only see like 20% of them, so they don't quite make the show for me. The lighting is also really cool, but again I can only see very little of it, and from the side of the stage I feel like I'm missing something. I wish that I could say that I loved the acting, but it's not compelling to me. (Is it bad that when I'm watching the show, I just want to redirect it??)
I really just feel like I'm putting in my time, like it's some sort of sentence...What can I find to love in this show?
